Losing Focus in Real Time

This will be a very quick post.  Just needed to try to clear my head.  My gradual forward momentum slipped into reverse and I'm panicing.  Gotta get some focus!

Yesterday, I went to meet Richard at his office and it felt like I could SMELL Jaymie in there.  It's been 18 months!!  I hate that she still has power over me like that.  Ruined my happy hour time with Richard.  In a very passive aggressive manner, which I never approve of,  I spent our cocktail hour imparting my wisdom on why he should terminate his partnership with Michelle.  She's just a leech.  Not worth keeping around.

What do I know?  It ain't my job!  I should have told Richard the truth, your office is a HUGE trigger!  It breaks my heart that I can't just drop by for lunch or to say hi without calling first.  Even when I do show up, which is next to never, his staff all hide from me.  (Haven't told you about the day I cleared the place out raging and ranting about Richard fucking Jaymie.  Scared the crap outta everyone!)

I'm back to looking at Jaymie's Facebook page.  Dwelling on how I could make her life suck, too.  It's been almost 6 months since I felt so angry and confused.  I was hoping by putting my gut feelings on the blog, my attitude would take a turn for the better.  Taking up a little bit of cyber space to ease my mind.

Whoa.  I gotta get a grip.  I will NOT let my emotions get in the way of my better judgement.  This too shall pass.  If putting my temporary troubles down for the world to read doesn't help,  I could add Jaymie's last name to the blog again.   Let the world know what that pathetic pee-brain did to me and thus, test out  how iron clad that restraining order is. ------Probably not.
Oh, well,  there's always vodka.  Just kidding....sort of.